I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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