What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Randomize
