You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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