We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize