would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
