he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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