Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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