a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
