He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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