You just made me feel so damn special
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
