he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize