please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
