how can u be prego again
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
