And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Life is so much better after having sex.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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