So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
