my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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