Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
