I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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