I have demons in me.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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