It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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