We named our party play list daddy issues
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
