He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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