just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I need a burrito and a hug.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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