Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
