P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
