like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
