After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize