I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
