Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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