She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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