I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
