ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
