i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize