Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize