I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
