He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
