shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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