No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
