I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
