how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
