My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize