bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
