it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
