But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
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