I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
