New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
