Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
