That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
