oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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