oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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